I am tired of people being mean to each other.
In every facet of my life, it seems–personally, professionally, on social media, out in public, on the highway, and everything else I’m forgetting–there is so much meanness. I mean, I pretty much can’t handle it anymore.
At the grocery store last night, there was an overweight woman shopping. She looked very sad and very alone.
It kind of killed me, because she walked in just before me, and she started out in the produce section. I was pulling for her as she grabbed a package of strawberries and a bag of carrots. She was pulled in by the whipped cream displayed next to the strawberries, though, and her resolve appeared to totally break at the display of ranch dips right after the carrots.
I would be remiss if I didn’t mention I was doing my third 20-minute walk of the day using this walking app I’m trying as my own weight loss journey continues. The aisles of Hannaford gave me lots of space to walk quickly, and my kids needed chocolate chip muffins for breakfast anyway (yes, I am familiar with the concept of irony), so it seemed like a good place to walk.
Three or four girls, probably late middle school or early high school, were walking around this woman by the time I turned onto the next aisle.
“Lady, do you know how many calories are in that?”
“Why do you even bother with the strawberries?”
“Try this. Try this. Try this.” Just tossing things into her basket. Cookies. Doughnuts. An entire ham.
They were skinny. They were pretty.
They were so mean.
One of my family members is going through a divorce.
When he broke the news to us, he said it was amicable and caused by typical growing apart. Everything would be good. Children coming first.
Perhaps she missed that memo, as her focus appears to be on herself, particularly the way she looks. She has lost 200 pounds and about 74% of her heart.
She unfriended me and the rest of my family on Facebook.
Whatever is going on between the two of them, she and I were, if not good friends, very close at times. We helped each other through a lot of stuff. She was the first person, along with my sister, that I told when I was pregnant with Clara. When I had a horrible PTSD struggle following Gabrielle’s birth, she kept my family together.
I sent her a message on FB:
Hope all is well. I just wanted to let you know how hurtful it was that you unfriended me on Facebook. You’ve been my XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX for a long time, and you will always be my XXXXXXX’s mother. I guess I just thought more of you… You were there for me and my kids through some tough times, and I’ve tried to always be there for you.
Anyway, I’ll always be here if you need me. I’m just very hurt.
Have a good day,
I got no reply. Nothing.
Not “I need some time”, “Communicating with your family is too hard right now”, not “I’m sorry I hurt you, but this is what I need to do for me right now.”
Any of those responses I could respect and appreciate.
That was so mean.
I was going to write more vignettes, but I think I’m going to approach meanness in social media and meanness in the workplace more directly.
Is it me, or is the world pervasively mean?
What can we do to fix it?